Ramos Gin Fizz
Mike Ciemnoczolowski

2 oz London dry gin

3 dashes lemon juice

3 dashes orange flower water

2 dashes lime juice

1 egg white

1 tbsp powdered sugar

3 oz cream, club soda

Do you enjoy sweating profusely?  Do you like the painful burning sensation in your arms that accompanies lifting curls for an hour straight or doing five hundred push-ups?  Do you fancy shaking a cocktail for roughly the same amount of time it will take you to drink it?  Well then, have I got a drink for you: the Ramos Gin Fizz!

 Invented in New Orleans in the 1880s by a bar owner named Henry Ramos, the aforementioned beverage has been inflating and enraging bar staffs and mixologists ever since.  This particular drink is so labor-intensive that the bar in which it was invented had twenty people on staff at any given time just to shake the things.  Frothy, citrusy, and almost like a milkshake, it takes roughly six minutes just to shake the thing.  So head on down to your local hardware or paint store and ask to borrow their paint shaker, because it’s time to enjoy a Ramos:

Combine gin, lemon juice, lime juice, orange flower water, egg white, and powdered sugar in a cocktail shaker with no ice (this is called a “dry shake”).  Shake for five minutes.  Add a handful of ice and shake for another minute.  Add cream and shake for five to ten seconds.  Pour without straining into a Collins glass.  Top with club soda (optional) and enjoy (required).

Impatient/lazy option: Combine all ingredients but club soda in a cocktail shaker with no ice.  Shake vigorously for thirty seconds to one minute.  Add a handful of ice and shake for ten seconds.  Strain into a martini glass.  Top with club soda (optional again) and enjoy (required again).  Cheers!